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ACCEPTING REALITY

Like I said in my previous post, these year has been a combination of my worst and best year . Lately things seemed to be going down the drain for me . There are things in life I definitely don’t want as a part of my lives history. I sometimes don’t want this things to be a reality. I know am definitely not the only one struggling with accepting reality especially with everything going on in 2020

Accepting reality might be a very difficult process. It does not mean we are ok with what we are accepting, it doesn’t mean with agree with it either. The best thing one can do when it rains is let it rain . Acceptance is all about the present and has nothing to do with the future. Accepting reality is not an act of failure but an act of courage for those who have the strength to face the truth and stop denying it .

Rejecting reality does not change it . Suffering is sometimes the minds refusal to accept reality. In order to accept reality we have to start with the first step which is radical acceptance. It is a skill for accepting things the way that they are. It helps you accept the reality of the situation so you can make smart choices. Radical acceptance means exactly what it sounds like .

You have to accept reality no matter what reality is. The first part of radical acceptance is understanding what you can not change and recognizing what you can change. You can change how long you choose to dwell on things, the choices you make , your attitude, your relationship with God and many others.

Sometimes we face unpleasant situations and difficult problems that make us feel helpless, confused and frustrated. Don’t try to understand everything cause somethings are not meant to be understood but accepted. You don’t have to continue suffering at the hands of things you can not control. Accept whatever situation your facing and let God take over. Remember to always stay positive.

Share your ideas and thoughts with me in the comment section am always open to new ideas .

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME 🎊🎉🎂

Gather ’round and celebrate the joy that has been given to me
A gift of love – of flesh and blood. A tiny bit of heaven.

See the wonder of it all, and marvel at the sight,
Share the happiness we know, celebrate the life God has given to me .

I Make memories of the times to come, of hours and days and years.
I Marked down each step, each task, each word – the laughter and the tears throughout the year .

For a celebration of life is such, that one must never be In too big a hurry to stop and smell… to feel… to touch… to see.

Yes, gather ’round and celebrate the life that has been given to me
A gift of love – of hope eternal. Our tiny bit of heaven.

A NEW BEGINNING

As my birthday approaches I keep getting more excited. I have decided to celebrate this new age with an Important event in my life. I really hope it motivates someone reading this. Two years ago around this same time I had a profound moment in which I realized I needed to completely change my life . I needed to do it fast and I needed to do it right . Most importantly I needed to stick to it . It’s been very challenging but I am so grateful for my rock bottom moment. My life feels completely different .

If I have learned anything on this personal development journey of mine, is that changing your life can happen in a moment of truth. The only thing I look back to on this day is to celebrate how far I have come on this journey. Imagine living life a whole year and you find yourself in the same exact place as you were the previous year ?

Maybe there’s someone reading this right now asking themselves “how do I change my life? “ Well I will share three things you need to consider before making this change.

Make a mindset shift. Your mindset is what sets the tone for everything in your life. What we think and believe is what acts upon us . Change your prospective about negative things and things you can not control. You may not be able to control how a person treats you but can control how you react to it . You do not need to change for the world . You need to change for you .

Embrace your authentic self . Understanding who you are and what you want . I really didn’t know who I was for a very long time . I wanted to be what everyone wanted me to be . This played a huge part in me feeling lost and empty for so long . Figure out what really matters to you in life . Minds are like flowers they only open when the time is right

Do a life audit start to figure out where you stand in the 8 areas of life. Personal Development, health, relationship, home life, free time, self-care and finances. What changes will make an impact in this areas.

I hope you make a decision today if you’re feeling lost . Share with me your thoughts in the comment section below. I am always open to new ideas for growth.

Happy birthday to everyone born today . And a very happy birth to all the Virgo’s reading this.

MY BIRTHDAY MONTH.

It’s my birthday month which I am usually stupidly always excited about every year. With every year that passes I totally embrace my new age and always thinking my new age is better than the last. I have really grown so much in the past years and this year has been a combination of the best and worst year of my life . I feel blessed for making it far into this year for many did not .

Because I am in my defining decade I don’t plan on screwing anything up . With this new age I plan on really upgrading my personality and creating long term goals . I want to share with you seven life upgrading lessons I have learned within the past years . I hope it motivates you to do the same.

I have learned to let go of my ego . Life becomes easier when you accept an apology you never got . I have learned my ego blinds and filters me from possibilities and progress.

I have learned to stop feeling bad about things of the past . The life in front of you begins in your mind. What you give power to has power over you. I learned to stop the heavy use of shoulda, woulda, coulda. Life is not a series of failures but an opportunity to get back up every time you fall .

I started taking really good care of my health. To be wealthy is to be healthy. Once your health is gone you really never get it back .

I started practicing mindfulness, I became more aware of my thoughts, my body sensation and surrounding. Mindfulness is a way of befriending ourselves. It really helps deal with stress in a very healthy way.

I learned to appreciate failure more. Failure is the best thing that can contribute to the making of an adult. To get a deeper knowledge of my understanding of failure read – THE SIMPLE POWER OF FAILURE.

I stopped making excuses and letting myself off the hook for not being the person I want to be. We will be happier and more successful if we stop giving excuses for everything.

And last but not the least I constantly want to learn something new and grow in it . Change is the end result of all true learning.

Share with me your thoughts in the comment section. Happy birthday to all born in the month of August .

A BAD WEEK

Sometimes we have those weeks where you don’t even wish you could hit rewind and do it all over again but instead wish you could hit all delete.

Here’s a little rundown of how last week went for me. Monday I was up late and missed an interview for a really great job, Tuesday my car broke down in the middle of traffic and I had to spend quite a lot to get it fixed and out of there . Wednesday I lost a friendship I cared much about , Thursday I felt really sick and could barely make it out of bed , Friday I lost my credit card and had some unknown transactions, Saturday I got a speeding ticket and Sunday after service my car wouldn’t start due to my battery dying.

It seemed that everything that could go wrong went wrong . Most reaction people have when the walls begin to crumble is crumble right along with the walls. I have learned not to allow the events in my life determine the course of my life. It is your reaction to this events that determine the quality of your lives.

When negative events seem to happen simultaneously it feels suffocating and difficult to overcome. The truth is there are many ways to cope with a bad day or week . I want to share the 3 things I did to help me through my bad week .

Dwell on the good things though it seems tough. With all the bad things happening to me there were equally good this that happened. Like I got another job interview with a better pay, got a $200 gift card from my sister to make me feel better. Instead of dwelling on this good things I made the mistake of dwelling on the bad ones. We should be thankful for the good things that happen to us no matter how small they may seem . Make a list of the good and bad things and celebrate the good ones.

Everything will be fine, it’s really not the end. Life has continual ups and down . We all have had low patches before and was able to get through them and learned from them. We are more than capable of overcoming anything . Focus on the things that makes you happy , get a massage, get some food , watch a movie . Do anything that makes you happy. As much as we might not like this idea but somethings are out of our control. Remember there are people who will love to have your bad days

Challenge yourself. Ok we had a bad week , will you let next week be the same? Accept the fact that there will always be bad days or weeks. Let the steam off , talk to someone if you have to. We have to fight through some bad days to earn the best days of our life.

Share with me a week or day that was bad in your life and how you dealt with it in the comment section. I am always open to new ideas.

WHEN TO GIVE UP

Often times we ask ourselves is it time to give up. Growing up I refused to take no for an answer especially from my dad even when I never really needed the stuff I asked for. That’s really when I understood it will be difficult for me to give up on things. However I have realized that blind persistence could turn into an exhausting and useless quest. One of the biggest challenges in life is knowing when to give up or change direction. It’s OK to stop trying maybe we would be a lot healthier, maybe wealthier and altogether happier , if we gave up on many things holding us back. Yeah I know we have been told never to give up , that has been the key verse in many of my write ups. No one likes to quit, perseverance is a great quality. A lot of great people would never have found success if they hadn’t kept getting up every time they got knocked down.

Listen, sometimes giving up is exactly what we should do. Yeah we are taught perseverance but sometimes that perseverance is what keeps us from moving forward. We all face life situations that demand that we choose to keep trying or give up. Professional situations, romantic relationships, relationships with family or friends. Giving up doesn’t make you a Failure. It only means you are mature enough to know when to cut your loss and move on. It means you are someone who has the ability to protect their mental health.

The painful truth is that some dreams don’t come true, some relationships Will never be healthy, some people will never love you the way you need to be loved. There are times you know In your heart it won’t work out, let’s say you are trying to sustain a friendship that is going through a rough patch. Think about if the person is willing to put as much effort as you are if not I think it’s time for you to find new friends.

Dreams are wonderful but we shouldn’t sacrifice our daily happiness for the hope of happiness in some distant future. Are you happy as you pursue your goals? Think about what you really want. Life is about the journey not the Destiination. ( it’s not how fast you go but how far you go). If the Journey makes you miserable then the Destiination is not worth it. What scares you from quitting? Are you worried about letting someone down? You can’t sacrifice your own happiness to make others happy. Let other people take care of themselves. Do what ever You need to find your own happiness.

The idea of giving up on something you’ve held so close to you can be terrifying. Especially in a relationship. Even when you think you can’t leave without that person, Remember that You are great no matter the decision you make. You’ll feel a loss at first but new desires and relationships will come. Following a long term dream isn’t going to be heart and roses all the time. If trying to accomplish your dreams make you feel like a failure then is time to stop. You’re only human you don’t have the power to bend the world to your wheel. Move on and find something that fulfills you. When the idea of giving up floats you with relief then is time to.

Giving up should never be your first option and yes it’s ok to if it’s an option. Share with me the situations in your life that makes you feel like giving up in the comment section. Would love to hear your opinion on this .

DEALING WITH A BROKEN HEART

Getting your heart broken is absolutely awful. Trust me I know. Most of us if not everyone have been there at some point. And most Times we are left wondering how to get over it. Before getting into this blog I will love you to know I have had my own share of a broken heart. This is not a researched write up but my own personal experience and how I dealt with it. I dedicated two years into loving someone and that didn’t work out for me. There is no sure ways to avoid a heartbreak ( unless you’re a robot with no emotional feelings). There are ways how ever to get through it. Even though there are times you believe you will never truly be happy again. Healing a broken heart takes time, sometimes longer than we often expected. Often times we blame ourselves. I spent weeks blaming myself, thinking I wasn’t good enough, finding problems within me that never existed. It turns out blaming yourself for a breakup makes it even harder to move on .

Most often after a break up, looking back at the relationship, it is easy for our minds to trick us into believing the relationship was much better than what it really was. In the moment it feels like you will never get over it, I am here to tell you that you absolutely will. If I did, I strongly believe you can. You learn many lessons from a broken and heart and believe me the were red flags from the very start. Because you ignored the red flags at the begging doesn’t mean they never existed. Yes the red flags were there, you saw them and you ignored them. Until you realize the relationship wasn’t gold from the very start, moving on may seem impossible. It took me a very long time to get over a heart break, longer than I wanted it to. In this write up I will talk on the three things I realized while dealing with a broken heart.

  1. It’s ok to grief the loss of the relationship. After a breakup we find ourself going through a wave of emotions (denial, anger, sad, depression and more). This emotion are normal. Allow yourself to grief, cry if you have too. Crying is therapy. But don’t let the breakup break you. Know you’re worth more than you think.
  2. Cut of communication with your ex. Stop looking for happiness in the same place you lost it. After a breakup we think we miss the ones who hurt us. No you don’t, you just miss the person you thought he or she was.
  3. Remember what sucked. Remember the things that hurt you you most, make a list if you can. See if you really want to relive those moments.

No matter how long it takes for you to move on, just know that the experience has only made you stronger. You might eventually look back and even be grateful the relationship came to and end. Cheer-up and know you will be involve again and it will be magnificent with the right person. The memories will fade so keep your head up. Always know the best is yet to come . That’s a rap. this was requested by a very good friend and hope it does something for you.

I am still working on my documentary write up and have to something special that will go up this week. Looking forward to your opinions and experiences in the comment section below.

HAVING A PRODUCTIVE MINDSET

A productive mindset is one that make use of your resources. It is not trying to do everything and be everything. It is making the best of what you have while enjoying the process. In this write up I will love to talk about the characteristics of a productive mindset.

Positive attitude : This is a must have when working on having a productive mind set. Not just for productivity but for success in general. You need to stay positive to achieve positive things in life. Yes we all get negative thoughts, yes we all get nervous. The good news is you are in control of your thoughts and can decide to change the negative thoughts into positive ones.

Persistence: This is my personal favorite. Although having motivation is a huge part of what gets you working towards your goals, you need persistence to keep you going. Most often motivation isn’t strong enough to pull you through difficult times. It is guaranteed that you will struggles , there will be times when you will feel like giving up. Being persistent is the only thing that can keep you going .

Vision: To be able to visualize your goals helps you focus and gives you and idea of what their outcome will look like. Vision helps gives you a variety of goals and their outcome. It is more difficult to strive for goals without having an idea of what the goals are.

Self-confidence: This was a topic on it’s own in my previous blog. It is believing that you are fully capable and can do whatever you set your mind to. Without self-confidence and faith you can not value the potential of your goal.

Balance: To function well and get the most out of life, we must maintain balance. Doing too much or pushing too hard on anything can lead to burnout or frustration. Take some time off for yourself, go on vacations. It is important to have fun while working towards your goals.

To conclude with, productivity is the absolute key to success. It also gets rid of negativity in your live. Like always I will love your opinion in the comment section. Remember to always come back for more Real Life Inspiration.

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