The most painful experience one can go through is from a breakup. I know what you’re probably thinking. There are many worse things that can happen to someone than going through a breakup. But when you’re going through one, you don’t really think of the other things that can happen in life that may be worse. All that matters in that moment is that you’ve parted ways with the love of your life. Rather someone you wanted to spend a long time with .
Everything in life takes time. Babies, butterflies. But even though things take time that doesn’t actually mean that time can heal you. If that were true then a lot of us wouldn’t be struggling with past events in our lives . I mean sure time can numb you of the pain, but it really has to be dealt with for you to get over it . But it helps to know that there are stages you will go through after a break up . After writing a lot about perfect relationships I noticed that I went through all of these stages after a break up. They’re all part of the healing process.
Denial .You pretend you’re both still together. You create scenarios in your head hoping y’all will get back together . You might even call up and tell them you can’t live without them, that you are soulmates and you’re meant to be in each other’s lives. You can’t or won’t accept it’s over. You still have this glimmer of hope that it will all work out. The sooner you accept it’s over no matter how painful it might be the better.
Ah yes, the bargaining stage . This is the stage . The stage where out of complete desperation, your ready to settle for anything, beg for one last chance . You tell yourself I can fix this. Don’t worry, I did that too . Don’t bargain for love , don’t ever settle the moment you see yourself trying to settle know it’s definitely time to let go . You wouldn’t have to settle for the right person.
Anger . This is was the stage that felt good. Using anger as a strategy to cope should only be temporary. Lingering on anger can make things worse in the long run, you need to deal with your pain eventually. But for now, it’s a way to decrease feelings of love and affection towards that person It opens your eyes up to what was wrong in the relationship. The scenarios you created in your head are gone and you see them for who they truly are.
Grief, the universal emotion. Crying, waking up feeling sick, lack of sleep, not being able to eat, mood swings. That all comes with this stage. It might be a little different for you. Maybe you’ll deal with it differently. I found comfort in my sadness, and eventually, that turned into anger.
acceptance is you won’t get triggered by anything to do with your ex. You hear their name and it won’t make you feel weird, you’ll wake up one morning and you will be alright. You won’t feel sad , you won’t miss them. You will be ready to love again.
No matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn’t stop for your grief . Move on work on yourself , set goals be great . Share with me your stages of break up in the comment section .