Tag Archives: #2020

ACCEPTING REALITY

Like I said in my previous post, these year has been a combination of my worst and best year . Lately things seemed to be going down the drain for me . There are things in life I definitely don’t want as a part of my lives history. I sometimes don’t want this things to be a reality. I know am definitely not the only one struggling with accepting reality especially with everything going on in 2020

Accepting reality might be a very difficult process. It does not mean we are ok with what we are accepting, it doesn’t mean with agree with it either. The best thing one can do when it rains is let it rain . Acceptance is all about the present and has nothing to do with the future. Accepting reality is not an act of failure but an act of courage for those who have the strength to face the truth and stop denying it .

Rejecting reality does not change it . Suffering is sometimes the minds refusal to accept reality. In order to accept reality we have to start with the first step which is radical acceptance. It is a skill for accepting things the way that they are. It helps you accept the reality of the situation so you can make smart choices. Radical acceptance means exactly what it sounds like .

You have to accept reality no matter what reality is. The first part of radical acceptance is understanding what you can not change and recognizing what you can change. You can change how long you choose to dwell on things, the choices you make , your attitude, your relationship with God and many others.

Sometimes we face unpleasant situations and difficult problems that make us feel helpless, confused and frustrated. Don’t try to understand everything cause somethings are not meant to be understood but accepted. You don’t have to continue suffering at the hands of things you can not control. Accept whatever situation your facing and let God take over. Remember to always stay positive.

Share your ideas and thoughts with me in the comment section am always open to new ideas .

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME 🎊🎉🎂

Gather ’round and celebrate the joy that has been given to me
A gift of love – of flesh and blood. A tiny bit of heaven.

See the wonder of it all, and marvel at the sight,
Share the happiness we know, celebrate the life God has given to me .

I Make memories of the times to come, of hours and days and years.
I Marked down each step, each task, each word – the laughter and the tears throughout the year .

For a celebration of life is such, that one must never be In too big a hurry to stop and smell… to feel… to touch… to see.

Yes, gather ’round and celebrate the life that has been given to me
A gift of love – of hope eternal. Our tiny bit of heaven.

A lITTLE WORD OF MOTIVATION

I woke up this morning feeling very empty . I had some kind of pain in me . Lately I have felt very weak and defeated in the spirit, I found myself asking God a series of questions. Why do certain things happen to us ? Why does he allow the devil to place hatred, wickedness, sickness, loss, and disappointments in our lives and the world.

I decided to turn to my bible for answers. I started reading the book of Mathew in the New Testament. It is one of my favorite chapters cause I love reading about Jesus teachings and his life journey. One thing that caught my attention was Mathew 12-13 . It tells me Jesus really does understand when we suffer similar loses. He weeps too when we cry. It’s easy for us to sometimes forget the humanity of Jesus.

We forget that he lost loved ones too. We forget he was rejected, he got frustrated at his disciples when they didn’t understand, he was betrayed too. He feels everything that we feel and he is there to walk us through our pain . All we need to do is believe and pray. Pain and problems don’t come from God but from the devil. Remember the story of job? God wants us to pray and he shall lift our burdens away from us . Mathew 6:25-33

Even when Jesus knew he was to be nailed on the cross he prayed and said “God if it is possible take this pain away from me “ He is just as human as we are .

Good morning ☀️.

A NEW BEGINNING

As my birthday approaches I keep getting more excited. I have decided to celebrate this new age with an Important event in my life. I really hope it motivates someone reading this. Two years ago around this same time I had a profound moment in which I realized I needed to completely change my life . I needed to do it fast and I needed to do it right . Most importantly I needed to stick to it . It’s been very challenging but I am so grateful for my rock bottom moment. My life feels completely different .

If I have learned anything on this personal development journey of mine, is that changing your life can happen in a moment of truth. The only thing I look back to on this day is to celebrate how far I have come on this journey. Imagine living life a whole year and you find yourself in the same exact place as you were the previous year ?

Maybe there’s someone reading this right now asking themselves “how do I change my life? “ Well I will share three things you need to consider before making this change.

Make a mindset shift. Your mindset is what sets the tone for everything in your life. What we think and believe is what acts upon us . Change your prospective about negative things and things you can not control. You may not be able to control how a person treats you but can control how you react to it . You do not need to change for the world . You need to change for you .

Embrace your authentic self . Understanding who you are and what you want . I really didn’t know who I was for a very long time . I wanted to be what everyone wanted me to be . This played a huge part in me feeling lost and empty for so long . Figure out what really matters to you in life . Minds are like flowers they only open when the time is right

Do a life audit start to figure out where you stand in the 8 areas of life. Personal Development, health, relationship, home life, free time, self-care and finances. What changes will make an impact in this areas.

I hope you make a decision today if you’re feeling lost . Share with me your thoughts in the comment section below. I am always open to new ideas for growth.

Happy birthday to everyone born today . And a very happy birth to all the Virgo’s reading this.

MY BIRTHDAY MONTH.

It’s my birthday month which I am usually stupidly always excited about every year. With every year that passes I totally embrace my new age and always thinking my new age is better than the last. I have really grown so much in the past years and this year has been a combination of the best and worst year of my life . I feel blessed for making it far into this year for many did not .

Because I am in my defining decade I don’t plan on screwing anything up . With this new age I plan on really upgrading my personality and creating long term goals . I want to share with you seven life upgrading lessons I have learned within the past years . I hope it motivates you to do the same.

I have learned to let go of my ego . Life becomes easier when you accept an apology you never got . I have learned my ego blinds and filters me from possibilities and progress.

I have learned to stop feeling bad about things of the past . The life in front of you begins in your mind. What you give power to has power over you. I learned to stop the heavy use of shoulda, woulda, coulda. Life is not a series of failures but an opportunity to get back up every time you fall .

I started taking really good care of my health. To be wealthy is to be healthy. Once your health is gone you really never get it back .

I started practicing mindfulness, I became more aware of my thoughts, my body sensation and surrounding. Mindfulness is a way of befriending ourselves. It really helps deal with stress in a very healthy way.

I learned to appreciate failure more. Failure is the best thing that can contribute to the making of an adult. To get a deeper knowledge of my understanding of failure read – THE SIMPLE POWER OF FAILURE.

I stopped making excuses and letting myself off the hook for not being the person I want to be. We will be happier and more successful if we stop giving excuses for everything.

And last but not the least I constantly want to learn something new and grow in it . Change is the end result of all true learning.

Share with me your thoughts in the comment section. Happy birthday to all born in the month of August .

A BAD WEEK

Sometimes we have those weeks where you don’t even wish you could hit rewind and do it all over again but instead wish you could hit all delete.

Here’s a little rundown of how last week went for me. Monday I was up late and missed an interview for a really great job, Tuesday my car broke down in the middle of traffic and I had to spend quite a lot to get it fixed and out of there . Wednesday I lost a friendship I cared much about , Thursday I felt really sick and could barely make it out of bed , Friday I lost my credit card and had some unknown transactions, Saturday I got a speeding ticket and Sunday after service my car wouldn’t start due to my battery dying.

It seemed that everything that could go wrong went wrong . Most reaction people have when the walls begin to crumble is crumble right along with the walls. I have learned not to allow the events in my life determine the course of my life. It is your reaction to this events that determine the quality of your lives.

When negative events seem to happen simultaneously it feels suffocating and difficult to overcome. The truth is there are many ways to cope with a bad day or week . I want to share the 3 things I did to help me through my bad week .

Dwell on the good things though it seems tough. With all the bad things happening to me there were equally good this that happened. Like I got another job interview with a better pay, got a $200 gift card from my sister to make me feel better. Instead of dwelling on this good things I made the mistake of dwelling on the bad ones. We should be thankful for the good things that happen to us no matter how small they may seem . Make a list of the good and bad things and celebrate the good ones.

Everything will be fine, it’s really not the end. Life has continual ups and down . We all have had low patches before and was able to get through them and learned from them. We are more than capable of overcoming anything . Focus on the things that makes you happy , get a massage, get some food , watch a movie . Do anything that makes you happy. As much as we might not like this idea but somethings are out of our control. Remember there are people who will love to have your bad days

Challenge yourself. Ok we had a bad week , will you let next week be the same? Accept the fact that there will always be bad days or weeks. Let the steam off , talk to someone if you have to. We have to fight through some bad days to earn the best days of our life.

Share with me a week or day that was bad in your life and how you dealt with it in the comment section. I am always open to new ideas.

THE SIMPLE POWER OF FAILURE.

In my previous blog post titled “when to give up “ constant failure was a key point . In my conclusion it was clearly stated that giving up should never be an option but if it is, then it’s time to . How do you react when you fail? I have failed in so many aspects over the years . Class examination, my first job, my first driving test, my business venture , the list can go on and on. Most of us (me included) think failure is unacceptable, as a result we dream of a land of perfectionism where there are few risk and fewer opportunities. Obviously failure isn’t something any of us enjoy. But for a lot of successful people the long term gain is worth the pain at the front end. Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly .

Failure can be an efficient teacher in our carriers, our financial lives and in living our goals . Before you can fail, you have to expand your horizons, take new risk . Many people avoid failure because the are scared of moving backwards after success. But even if your moving in the wrong direction, your still headed somewhere. Every slip up bring you one step closer to success. It inspires us to broaden our thinking . The more you work on something the more meaning it carries . If it were so easy to accomplish our goals then it won’t be worth accomplishing.

Failure has a way of motivating and keeping you humble. It helps overcome fear . Once you face it, it becomes the enemy you know. There’s a popular saying “if it doesn’t kill you, it only makes you stronger.” This familiarity helps you move with confidence that a stumble or a fall won’t be the end of your journey. Society seems to have a huge hang up on failure, using it to define us , stop us from trying again .

Sometimes failing at something even if you truly desire it is and indication that something elsewhere isn’t right. Luckily for us we live in a prosperous world. Where there isn’t just one opportunity to do anything. There are always second chances and sometimes third .

Failure isn’t what defines us but and asset for our growing skill. It builds character. When you fail you develop a deeper understanding of yourself. success is often achieved by those who don’t know that failure is inevitable. There’s so much I have and we can all learn from failure . I have not failed I have just found 10,000 ways that won’t work . Have you benefited from failure ? What is the most surprising or important lessons it taught you?

Share it with me in the comment section , I am always open to all opinions.

WHEN YOU THINK YOUR NOT GOOD ENOUGH REMEMBER THIS.

Sometimes if not often I am really unfair to myself and relentlessly compare myself to other people , no matter how many times I hear how good enough I am. I get stuck in myself and allow my inner critic to completely tear apart my self-esteem until I hate myself too much. Sometimes the hardest part of the journey is simply believing you’re worthy of the trip. Most times the pressure coming from peers, family, work and society in general Is enough to make us completely broken Inside. “Why is this a problem you ask ?” well Self-hate can affect us mentally, our relationships, our life goals and education. Dealing with self-hate has been an ongoing battle for so long, maybe it has to do with my obsession with perfection. And for you struggling with self-hate like me here’s a few things to remember.

1) Nobody is doing better than you because nobody can do better than you. The reasons we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind the scenes circumstances with everyone’s else’s public highlight reel. Your life is about breaking your own limits and outgoing yourself to live your best life.

2) Remember happiness is allowing yourself to be perfectly OK with “what is“ rather than wishing and worrying about what is not, “what supposed to be” or “what it will not be”. You can’t control everything that happens to you you can only control the way you react to what happens.

3) When you choose to be miserable you will find plenty of reasons to be but if you choose happiness, life will give you so many reasons to be happy. You are in control of your mind and your thoughts, not the other way around.

4) Failures are really just lessons that need to be learned. No day is ever wasted when you live it with purpose and presence. Enjoy the journey when there are detours along the way. Life it self is full mistakes how we learn from this mistakes is the definition of who we are .

5) Experience is the hardest kind of teacher. It gives you the test first then the lessons afterwards. This is really a blessing if we look at it in a Christian light, means you’re going stronger and more capable of every passing day.

6) You don’t need anyone’s approval. Stop listening to what the world has to say and start listening to you. There are only a few people in the world that will be 100% honest with you and you’re one of them. You’re more than good enough you just have to own it .

7) celebrate all your wins not only the big ones but the small ones too. A small step forward is still a step forward no matter how small it is. Celebrate the small wins in anyway you can. You can’t hate your way into loving yourself. Tell yourself you’re not up to a potential won’t help you reach that potential.

You’re enough just the way you are, it will be a lot easier every time you remind yourself s of that. You may think there’s a lot of wrong with you but there’s also a lot of right with you . Remember you’re not alone and endings are also new beginnings.

Share with me the points that relate to you most in the comment section and I am always open to opinions.

WHEN TO GIVE UP

Often times we ask ourselves is it time to give up. Growing up I refused to take no for an answer especially from my dad even when I never really needed the stuff I asked for. That’s really when I understood it will be difficult for me to give up on things. However I have realized that blind persistence could turn into an exhausting and useless quest. One of the biggest challenges in life is knowing when to give up or change direction. It’s OK to stop trying maybe we would be a lot healthier, maybe wealthier and altogether happier , if we gave up on many things holding us back. Yeah I know we have been told never to give up , that has been the key verse in many of my write ups. No one likes to quit, perseverance is a great quality. A lot of great people would never have found success if they hadn’t kept getting up every time they got knocked down.

Listen, sometimes giving up is exactly what we should do. Yeah we are taught perseverance but sometimes that perseverance is what keeps us from moving forward. We all face life situations that demand that we choose to keep trying or give up. Professional situations, romantic relationships, relationships with family or friends. Giving up doesn’t make you a Failure. It only means you are mature enough to know when to cut your loss and move on. It means you are someone who has the ability to protect their mental health.

The painful truth is that some dreams don’t come true, some relationships Will never be healthy, some people will never love you the way you need to be loved. There are times you know In your heart it won’t work out, let’s say you are trying to sustain a friendship that is going through a rough patch. Think about if the person is willing to put as much effort as you are if not I think it’s time for you to find new friends.

Dreams are wonderful but we shouldn’t sacrifice our daily happiness for the hope of happiness in some distant future. Are you happy as you pursue your goals? Think about what you really want. Life is about the journey not the Destiination. ( it’s not how fast you go but how far you go). If the Journey makes you miserable then the Destiination is not worth it. What scares you from quitting? Are you worried about letting someone down? You can’t sacrifice your own happiness to make others happy. Let other people take care of themselves. Do what ever You need to find your own happiness.

The idea of giving up on something you’ve held so close to you can be terrifying. Especially in a relationship. Even when you think you can’t leave without that person, Remember that You are great no matter the decision you make. You’ll feel a loss at first but new desires and relationships will come. Following a long term dream isn’t going to be heart and roses all the time. If trying to accomplish your dreams make you feel like a failure then is time to stop. You’re only human you don’t have the power to bend the world to your wheel. Move on and find something that fulfills you. When the idea of giving up floats you with relief then is time to.

Giving up should never be your first option and yes it’s ok to if it’s an option. Share with me the situations in your life that makes you feel like giving up in the comment section. Would love to hear your opinion on this .

IS 2020 CANCELED?

January 1 2020 marked the beginning of a new decade that many looked at with optimsm and a chance on a new lesson on life. Now only a few months into 2020 many are wondering if this year could get any worst. I wonder if what has happened so far could be a forbidding indicator of what is to come. 2020 has been and emotional draining year for me, with so many tragedies happening around the world and the personal adjustment I have had to make. I believe am not alone on these and feel like many feel the same way . And many like me have come to the conclusion that 2020 is a year worth canceling . Before going into my point I would like to give a recap of the events that have occurred around the world.

  1. Australian bush fire. More than half of Australia have been directly affected by bush fire crises including millions whose health were affected. This occurred January 9 2020 at the very start of the year.
  2. Taal volcano eruption in the Philippine which occurred January 12 2020. There were no immediate reports of casualties but there was major damage.
  3. The tragic death of Kobe Bryant on January 26 2020. Kobe one of the NBA’S all time greatest player was killed at age 41 in a helicopter crash with his 13 year old daughter and seven others.
  4. Earthquake in Turkey January 24 2020. About 1,607 where hospitalized.
  5. Devastating floods in Indonesia February 23 2020
  6. Locust swam in East Africa and south Asia. February 21 2020
  7. Gas plant explosion in Lagos Nigeria Friday June 5 2020.
  8. COVID-19 pandemic . The outbreak of COVID-19 is one 2020 calamity that has caused significant human suffering and global economic disruption. This pandemic is far from over and we are adopting new ways to live with the virus.
  9. The tragic death of Gorge Floyd a 46 year old African American . On may 25 2020 Floyd was killed in Minneapolis, Minnesota after a white police office knelt on his neck for almost 9 minutes. The killing of Floyd led to a protest for justice in all 50 states in the US and 18 other countries making it the greatest protest for justice in history

That’s a handful and we are only 6 months into 2020. I felt like my life was on hold when all these started. The tragedies don’t seem to stop and nothing seems to workout. The corona virus which kept us all home is still very much around and we are just learning new ways to survive it. I started thinking to myself, how do I escape from this? am I ready for what’s to come ? I was so ready to give up on this year then it hit me. what if 2020 isn’t worth canceling like we think, what if 2020 is really the year we been waiting for? A year so uncomfortable , so painful, so scary, so raw that it forces us to grow . A year that screams so loud finally awakening us . A year we finally accept the need for change. A year we are able to measure our strength and weakness, a year we learn to find happiness even in the worst moments of life.

I am no prophet but am here to tell you 2020 isn’t canceled, it’s just getting started. You got to make the best out of it and most importantly stay united through it. The world has slowed so that we can rediscover ourselves. Remember what doesn’t kill you , makes you stronger. I am open to conversation in the comment section. Tell me how 2020 has affected you and how this write up has helped you . I am open to criticism too. Be sure to come back for my next post and remember I have a documentary going live anytime.

GOAL SETTING

Everyone has different goals, depending on life style, values and definition of success. Your goals are unique to you and don’t need to look like anyone else. Goal setting can be defined as identifying something you want to accomplish and establishing measurable objective to help you achieve it. Setting goals can help you in every area of your life, from achieving finical freedom to adopting a healthy diet. This has been my case. I was always very careless with my spending and didn’t set goals and priority (like paying my bills on time or saving). I was able to break through this by setting progressive goals that allowed me small wins like saving, working out daily and eating healthy. Small wins like this helps you move on to larger achievements . Being able to set goals and achieve them have been an overwhelming feeling of joy.

Gaol setting is also vital cause it help you decide and focus on what is really important to you. Before this very moment I had no goals, no plans for the future . I lived everyday blindfolded not knowing what I really wanted. Setting effective goals lets you measure your life progress and see how far you’ve come. If you don’t set any goals , you can’t have a plan for life. Many people sometimes feel as if they’re adrift in the world. They work hard but don’t seem to get anywhere worthwhile. A key reason is cause they haven’t spent enough time setting goals on what they really want from life. AS mentioned earlier this was a big deal with me .

To set goals first consider what you want to achieve, and then commit to set smart and specific goals. Goals that motivate you to write them down to feel tangible. You always want to set goals that inspire you and not others. It is better to be at the bottom of the ladder you want to clime than to be at the top of the one you don’t. I always wanted some kind of approval from everyone, so much that I did whatever made them happy and not me. To conclude this right up, I will give you five tips on setting effective goals that I am currently working with.

  1. State each goal as a positive statement. Check out my blog post on being positive. Never be negative while setting a goal.
  2. Write goals down. This crystallizes them and give them more force.
  3. Set realistic goals. it is important to set goals that you can achieve. setting unrealistic goals lead to failure.
  4. Set priorities within your goal. When you have several goals, give each a priority. This helps you avoid feeling overwhelmed and not balanced. (check out my blog on finding balance for more on this)
  5. Be precise with your goals. Put your goals in dates and time so you can measure you achievement

Always remember to share your opinions in the comment section. I won’t be writing as often because I am working an a very important documentary. I believe will be one of my best works. it is the success journey of the world richest man and I am excited for you guys to read. In the main time be sure to come back for my next post on achieving goals.